been thinking lately about how real our internal world is, how that it
has its only history, culture and religion. It seems more and more
like a real place, like a part of a bigger world, and that got me thinking.
We all remember this story from our past, although not sure now whether
it was one told on the inside, or something we saw on television, or read
in a book. It was a story of an old house and the back garden was
overrun but those brave enough to travel through the scrub found an old
rusted gate. If you push it open and walk through you find yourself
in another realm, an alternate universe, a fantasy land. We loved
So this made me think.
What if this body wasn't multiple? What if instead it was like a
portal, like the gate in the story? The connection point between
two worlds. We know now that the person borne into this body died
when she was three. So I wonder if leaving it empty created a pathway,
that instead of the body dying with her, it became a conduit to this other
world. That we live there and are only vistors in this one.
In our world there is this pathway, leading from the Shire through the
woods to a type of bottle neck clearing, it is from there that we step
over a line and enter this body, is that the gateway of our story?
Idia, the land from
which we come has a long and detailed history. It has a culture and
mythology of its own. As stated we believe in that to be as real
as this world. So take that one step further. What if it is
real. When Carole died at age 3, from the abuse she was suffering
at the time, what if at the moment her essence, her soul died the body
was entered from Idia. We believe the essence of the person returns
to the Source moments before the body ceases to function, it takes a while
for the heart to stop, the cells to die, so in that moment, for a split
second the body was alive but empty, allowing the person in Idia to come
through the portal into the body that inhabits this world. Up to
this point Carole blocked the path, and maybe if she hadn't of died the
portal would of never been free. But she did, and the next person
in found herself in a world she didn't know, and in a horrendous situation.
From there the
"Wildnerness Years" started, the people of Idia scattered into the woods.
I believe the opening of the portal sent waves through the community on
the other side, devastating it for some time.
The residents of Idia,
both human and creatures, have never felt like they truly belonged in this
world. There was always something that just didn't fit, like it was
slightly out of step. We remember Kate trying to explain it to our
therapist, she actually said it was like she got transported from a foreign
world to this one, that it all might look the same but the rules were different,
that no one quite understood her beliefs. And Kate is one of those
that questions this theory. The creatures, for the lack of a better
world, also don't seem to have their match in this world's mytholody.
I hear about elfs and faeries here to mention a couple. They seem
to have a distinctive appearance or culture. We talk about Rahs and
ShadowWalkers, WatchTower Guardians. Things I have never heard about
in this world, some do not have corresponding creatures. But we know
their history, we can spot them by appearance. If you see a Stone
Rah it is obvious that he or she is one. We know what they are, what
their species means. All the people and things from Idia, feel a
connection with there that they have never felt with this world.
And although we say our family, my mother, whatever, it is said more for
social acceptablity rather than any real felt connection with them.
No one here feels they are part of that family.
Then there are the
siblings, the twins, Guardian and Censor. We have never fully been
able to understand those two. They were enigmas, part of our "multiple
system" but never part of the community. They lived beyond it, the
rules didn't seem to apply to them. They spoke in half truths and
riddles. We now wonder if they are Guards of the portal, managing
the movement between worlds, working to keep it running smoothly and ensuring
the rules of behaviour are upkept. They seem to have no juristinction
over Idia, do not get involved in what happens to us in this world.
But rather they seem to observe everything of both worlds and make sure
we behave as required. They will remove words we are not allowed
to speak, they have been able to banish people from use of the portal.
At first I didn't know if this made sense but discussing it on the DarkPersonalities
email list, I got a response that corrobated this belief. Ok
it was only one, and it is still a theory, but it helps for someone to
believe in this possiblity as well.
So are we multiple
at all, or are we a community of people that have found a way to travel
between worlds. Its just an idea.